Tuesday, February 09, 2016

Please don't

After being called off my sick bed to answer the door to chuggers from the Battersea Dogs Home (this is Somerset, for goodness sake), and then again to an 'art student' who couldn't speak any English but had translated cue cards for every response he thought he was getting...

I thought I'd put up a polite notice saying please don't... 

You can buy them online:

- Paper not wanted: Leaflets, flyers, advertisements, menus, junk mail.
- People not wanted: Sales people, charities, religious people, cold callers.
- Consequences: dogs, police, trading standards, prosecution.
Highlights of this collection for me include:
'Strictly addressed mail only' (write your own dominatrix quip).
'We don't need any advice'.
'Please leave and do not return'

What would a polite brush-off look like? I don't want to seem rude.